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Deviant art sex

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  1. So here's my real-life advice for you, which I want you to remember forever -- instead of worrying about what kind of sex you like or, even worse, what kind of sex other people like, because nothing could ever be less important than something you don't want to see and no one wants to show you , use this rule of thumb: "The freakier the sex, the better it is for me, according to science. If you're a freak, then you know exactly what I'm talking about, and if the only thing you like is missionary position while a saxophone plays, then you're the only person like that, and we're all a bit scared of you. People who indulge in the ol' spanky-spank or whatever are more extroverted and open to new experiences duhhhhhh , but also less neurotic, anxious, and paranoid.

  2. That's right: Everyone who got irrationally angry at those last few paragraphs are less sane than the people who didn't, and that's the least shocking sentence I've ever written. If you're a freak, then you know exactly what I'm talking about, and if the only thing you like is missionary position while a saxophone plays, then you're the only person like that, and we're all a bit scared of you.

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